Dear Dennie #2 - mentoring 101

A monthly letter/column as written for & published also by Women in Transportation Services

Mentoring 101
Dear Dennie,

I have trouble speaking up at meetings. I was told to stand like Superman to get my confidence up. It didn’t work. Plus it was awkward to do it at a team meeting while everyone else was sitting. Any other advice?

No cape; no voice

Dear NCNV,

That is a great conversation to hold with your mentor: In what ways we are quieted? What holds our voice back?

Common fears include:

•      Not being prepared

•      Not knowing what to say

•      People laughing

•      Stuttering or other vocal slurring

•      Hurting someone

•      Boring someone

We may silence ourselves with fears or uncertainties, yet sometimes external factors keep us quiet. Others might try to silence us. (e.g. Don’t mention X; the executive hates X) We might allow ourselves to be silenced by following unspoken rules (e.g. I’m the junior in the room and should speak only when asked).

Ask yourself a few questions to help you decide:

1.    Is the information supportive of the agenda or other people involved in the conversation?

2.    Who needs to know I know that? Why?

3.    What’s more important at this particular moment – my comfort or my voice?

Choose to be silent. Others or your own worries should not choose for you.

Now, ask me anything.... :-)

dennie