When you really don’t feel up to it

So - how do you maintain your network and keep mentoring when you’re feeling truly depressed or simply discouraged?

No - this isn’t a hidden cry for help or a question for which there is only one answer.

But lately my own struggles have skewed my interaction with my world. I’m not comfortable putting on a fake face - though I do have comfort in putting on a brave one.

I just don’t have the energy or resources to reach out with both hands to those who depend on me or to those on whom I depend. My life is a little overwhelming at the moment and my career is a piece of that puzzle.

It’s crummy to be so down in the hot sunny days of summer. Somehow the snow and sleet are better for lying in bed and wondering about life.

My solution? I can only speak for myself of course…
1 - I set a minimum of interaction below which my ethics are compromised and make myself stick to it. I will feel worse about myself if I throw my hands up and let everything go to pot instead of just the pieces I think are doing so without my help. But I will not put my schedule over the solitude I currently crave.
2 - I won’t take on any new commitments until I feel more settled emotionally once more.
3 - I will let my mentors and peers know that, with my thought processes muddied, I might rely more on theirs to help me through.
4 - I will trust in the decisions I made a few months ago instead of giving into the doubts that besiege me now (unless I get new hard facts to change the decisions).

Being professional is often synonymous with being impersonal. I don’t subscribe to that. For my network to be successful and my mentoring to be meaningful, I have to be human. Sometimes that means asking for help. Sometimes that means admitting I’m not on top of my game. That approach gives all of us permission to do the same if we so choose.

I’ll be here on this blog. I just may not have time for tea at the moment.