Someone asked me this weekend what qualities I find intriguing in people. My mind immediately went to “you mean those I’d be friends with? those I’d date? those I’d want to learn with?”
We often divide our world - creating different sets of behaviours and expectations in each place. I find myself fragmented as a result of having to cordon off each segment. It’s perfectly normal behaviour but I want to deliberately make a more seamless community.
If I can flow through the various demands and folks in my network with an understanding of how it all fits together, it implies an understanding of myself and my contributions. For example, while I may still be the shopaholic only with my friends, I choose to be a connector in all areas.
Being true to my values, choosing my options rather than letting habit dictate my actions, and acknowledging my strengths/limits is a life deliberately lead.
So focusing across all the area of my life - someone would be intriguing to me if they:
• Appreciate the here and now even while looking towards the future
• Take responsibility - are deliberate vs. being guided by habit
• Seek learning - are fearless about asking questions
• Laugh, a lot
It’s not easy to do the list above at work on a crazy day. It’s really hard to do it when someone I care about is finding me tiresome. It’s exhilarating to do it during an ‘ah ha!’ moment and the options open.