Time for a change

We own our careers. There are tools to help and people to support us but, ultimately, the choices and decisions are ours.

It may not always feel that way when trying to prove something to a new manager/sponsor/peer about what we can/cannot do. It definitely is harder to remember who holds the power during year end reviews, requests for promotions/increases/assignments.

Motivation comes from us... ourselves... Other folks can put tools in our path but ultimately, those tools only matter if it strikes the right chord for the time/place/mindset in which we find ourselves at certain points in our careers.

Money, recognition, and challenge are the three common buckets from which we can draw to motivate ourselves. We have all made decisions about joining/staying/leaving based on these factors. These offers from our jobs mesh (or don't) with our own work ethic, sense of self (at the time) and drive (which also can fluctuate).

I spent a lot of time reflecting on the above during the holidays. It's time for me to challenge myself to get the piece I've always been the most reluctant to request. It's time to be honest with myself about what I want to do and how. It's time to go out into the world and find my next job that will shape the coming decade.

I love what I do. It's time to say it proudly, publicly and go big!

Scary? Absolutely. Necessary? Maybe. Exciting? Yes. Gets me thinking and feeling proud of my attitude?  Totally.

If I say this to mentorees, then I should walk my talk. If we can say the above about ourselves and our careers, then that's a great place to start the search!

Some days I'm just too dumb...

Yup. It's one of those days where I don't feel smart enough to do my job. I sit at my desk waiting for the Fraud Police to come tap me on the shoulder. "You are not qualified. Come with us." Or Imposters Anonymous to offer me a lifetime membership.

When I was a kid, my parents used to stare at my forehead when I told them something. They claimed a blue mark appeared if I was bluffing. I cut bangs in my hair as soon as I could wield a pair of scissors.

It's not an uncommon feeling for many; it sure is uncomfortable. Some days it's simply because we're off our game. Other times, it's because every action seems to lead no where. Occasionally it is because we are learning something new that someone else thought we already had down pat.

I think today it's all three :-)

All we can do is remember someone believed in us enough to give us the assignment. Our best is good enough. When it is not, then we'll learn something and our best gets better.

A little feedback, an ask for help, some honesty about my struggle, perhaps even put something minor off until tomorrow and not call it procrastination... there are all ways to get through the day.

Though today is still going to be tough slogging, tomorrow I'll be in a better position to help someone else get out of their hole-of-the-day.

Honesty

May I speak plainly? Most folks don't say what they mean.

I'm not talking about being polite; I'm refering to a growing tendency to not:

• express opinions that aren't popular
• debate
• be open /transparent
• be honest about feelings
• speak from the heart

Speaking openly doesn't mean being brutal about it. It doesn't mean being inconsiderate of someone's feelings (though feelings do get hurt sometimes even when it's not intended). It doesn't mean attacking.

Speaking openly can create better communication: letting issues surface before they become deep-rooted and large. It can take the pressure off guessing what someone 'really' means. It can remove inference /implication and allow both parties to understand each other a little better. It's so easy to misunderstand; why do we add layers of well-meaning misdirection?

Speaking plainly can be uncomfortable initially but create faster and more satisfying resolution.

Try one conversation today where you don't swallow what you were going to say... just gently say it. Chances are you'll be met in kind.