Pandemics and boredom

Are you bored yet? Are you bored of seeing the posts about people being bored? Is it really boredom?

Is it boredom?

• Is it uncertainty about personal finances or jobs and no ability to do much about it?
• Is it frustration with our homes having become more places to eat/sleep than live?
• Is it inertia due to a lack of hobbies or creative outlets to help express emotions and needs?
• Is it grieving for the routines and habits that made our day feel 'normal?'
• Is it angst about not being able to help or be helped?
• Is it indifference to the pieces closest to us that loom larger without external distractions?
• Is it nervousness waiting and waiting ....?

I am feeling all these things. I am not bored. Plus, I'm sure there are more questions than I've listed above.

Clarifying a problem by asking questions  - instead of jumping to solution - is a great mentoring technique. On a Zoom call last week, many folks were solving the "problem of boredom," suggesting activities and perspectives meant to keep the spirit alive.

Question "boredom;" address the root cause.  

Asking better questions

Questions are the key to answers

Duh. I know. However, in today's environment, we tend to skip to the answers without asking enough questions to really dig into the problem. This is a great discussion to have in the mentoring relationship.

We attend meetings with prepared answers for questions that have not been asked. This may be good preparation but only if we still listen to the questions that also are actually asked during the discussion. Politicians answer with what they want to say vs. what was asked. This doesn't work well in problem solving or gaining approval for a new idea. 

For example, researchers say that good sleep is key to better decision-making. Terrific. Yet, getting a good night's sleep is only one factor in  being able to make good decisions. 

Once the issue of good sleep and all the questions it opens are examined, then answers can be debated and fixes prioritized.  Then, we can look at other issues affecting our decision-making (control, confidence, aptitude, etc.).  Fix is rarely as simple as the +/-140 character statement: "I'll get better sleep so I can make better decisions."

When we keep asking "why" before jumping to who/what/how, all the issues emerge. Then we can solve based on the most pressing/necessary - which is not always the order in which issues are uncovered.

We often look for shortcuts - not necessarily because of laziness but because time is so short. Plus (inner voice) does everything have to take so much effort!? Questions don't take extra effort, just extra time. 

Jumping to solution?

"Sometimes an answer/approach/tactic is not enough. It's best to explain the question before requesting execution of the resolution..."

So said me at a meeting last week. At which point I was shouted down and told the deadline was too tight for discussion and we had to get 'er done! 

Which is ok - because we can ask the questions while executing. Iterative approach and discussion do not mean waiting unless we have mapped all the routes before we start the journey. 

It's just never ok to not ask questions and clarify the problem we're trying to solve - at any stage!

Ask more questions

There are a lot of articles and posts coming out now around questions and the art of posing them. Positive, challenging or as a negotiating tactic, questions are never a bad thing.

Our current North American culture has us seen as inefficient or slow if we don't immediately jump to a solution when faced with a problem or complaint. However, sometimes asking the right questions can drive to an excellent outcome faster than simply responding with ideas from the potentially narrow reference framework we may have in a given situation.

Here's a few questions that might help the next time someone approaches you with a problem:

"Do you need someone to listen so you can work this out or do you need me to solve this for you?"
"Why is this issue important?"
"Who else could help with this issue?"
"What would happen if we let this sit for an hour/day/month...?"
"What ideas do you have ...? And what other ideas? ...and what other ideas?..."
"What can I offer you that makes me the right resource for this problem?"
"Has anyone else ever dealt with this?"

Like many problems, the real issue is often cloaked in a litany of smaller issues that may not need to be resolved to create a good solution. Asking questions can help determine the heart of the matter and the role we are expected to play. Assumptions are only as good as the questions we ask to confirm them.

You take your skills wherever you go

I've got a new job and it's very exciting; it's been a while since I've been in a position where I didn't know what I was doing. I am finding it exhilarating!

Day four and what I've most noticed is... that while I may not understand the nuance and tasks associated with the business and the job, the skillset I have is exactly the right fit for the job. Too often we get caught in the details, worrying that the specifics are missing. It is really the big picture into which we need to fit; everything else falls into place with time and experience.

Actually, I did the very thing I coach others to never do. As the job was described to me, I said "Hey, I know some great folks to send you who will be terrific!"
"Why not you?" I was asked.
"Oh no... I could only do a third of the job competently," I replied.

sigh.
Even the mentors forget their training occasionally.

Am I immediately useful to my new manager? Yes. Because I understand the critical thinking necessary for success in delivering what he wants. So I can ask good questions even if I don't have access or understanding of the specifics yet. Risk, controls, cost, people, behaviours, etc. are all still valid questions. In answering these questions, the entire teams drives to a deeper and stronger solution.

I might not be able to propose solutions at this point but I certainly can contribute thoughtful questions. That's a habit to keep, new in the job or not.

When you are busy, ask more questions

It seems like the faster we go, the less we question what we are doing or why. Yet, many agree it takes more effort to undo /correct than it does to take an extra moment the first time around.

Here's some simple advice, often forgotten, that my kid prompted me with the other day:

"Why is this important?" (vision, risks, urgency)

and

"Who can help?" (dependencies, support, impacts)

Ask yourself. Ask your manager when getting an assignment. Ask your co-worker who is racing about. Ask your kid stuck on homework. As your friends…

Maybe you'll save time taking time?