Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Asking for help - a lost art?

Asking for help seems to be hard for folks (including me) to do.

We are able to share stories after a personal event (prompting a "why didn't you call me?" from the listener). We support each other through the "lessons learned" debrief of a project. But many hesitate to ask for support during a crisis, large or small.

I'm not convinced it's a gender thing. (The stereotype that men don't ask for directions notwithstanding) Is it a worry about being seen as weak or vulnerable? Are we entering an "every person for themselves" mentality?

We all have relationship on which we rely - personal and professional. Yet, we hesitate to call upon their expertise or good will.

Maybe part of the problem is in how and when we offer help? Are we so caught in our own busy-ness that we require someone to solicit help to pull us out of our own worlds? So we're not asking and not offering and creating a circle where giving and receiving support is a lost art on both sides?

Shouldn't the giving and receiving of support - and the coaching thereof - be another leadership deliverable?

I'm not sure what the answer is. I know I probably will not get better at asking so I've resolved to try more offering.

No comments: